On nights I work, I usually try to take a shower when I get home at 2:30 AM. At least the water temperature and pressure does not bounce all over the place then, usually. During the day is a whole other story.

During the day, taking a shower while the little one is not napping is all but impossible. It is an exercise in the futile, at best. I’ll usually prop open the bathroom door and strap the baby in her bouncy chair, placed where I can see her from behind the shower curtain. Then I will give her a fun toy - or three. I use only the semitransparent part of the shower curtain. She can see someone/thing behind it, but not necessarily make out that it is her scary, wet and naked papa.

She really can’t see anything from behind the curtain, other than a vague shape of a person. I’m really quite modest now, mainly because of having a baby to take care of during the day. I know she won’t really remember things from this early in her life, but I still don’t want to take any chances. It’s just kind-of weird for me.

As soon as the water gets turned on, she screams. I jump behind the curtain, and hope the water has not suddenly become too hot or too cold (which it does with little warning during the day). Once behind the curtain, I throw my boxers over the top onto the towel pile.

She yells some more, and I lather up my hair. She screams some more, and I rinse. Wash, rinse repeat. This lasts about five minutes before I’ve had enough. The water goes off, and she stops. I grab the waiting towel, and proceed to play peek-a-boo from behind the curtain with my face, until she starts giggling again - which is pretty quick.

No joy. I just want a real shower…

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